dating

07 Feb 2012

‘I Heart Nerds’ Speed Dating Party is Back!

I had a regular when I was a bartender. 33, classically gorgeous and a bar owner, he had a crush on me because I didn’t give a shit, i.e. wasn’t hot enough to be seen in public with.  He’d bring in every feminine cliche (Biracial Burlesque Performer, Marketing Intern Who

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23 Jan 2012

Regal Battery Park- The Best Movie Theater to Give Head In

One time I went down on a guy during a matinee of ‘The Queen’ at the Angelika. Fittingly enough, he came out to me a year after. We went out only a few times before he left for a tour of Asia in 2006; we  had a coffee the following

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16 Jan 2012

South’s: Where to dump your girlfriend. And have fries!

Visitors, even natives, to the city are constantly searching for the right place for special occasions. Where’s the perfect lighting for a proposal? Which brunch restaurant have children’s menus? Can I get a birthday reservation at that Indian restaurant for Saturday?

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04 Jan 2012

How to Successfully Meet the Parents When You’re a Broke-Ass

So you’ve finally done it– you’ve met someone who makes you happy.  Someone who doesn’t make you want to barf when you look at them.  Someone who doesn’t care that you drool during your sleep, or sometimes like to re-enact dance sequences from Billy Elliot while wearing a Forever Lazy

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30 Nov 2011

The Perks of Being a Bilingual Broke-Ass

  I want to be bilingual, for a variety of reasons.  Personally, I don’t like feeling like such an “ugly American” when rubbing elbows with the international crew that comes along with dating a well-traveled half-Brazilian.  Being able to speak another language would make me seem more worldly in front

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17 Aug 2011

How to Be Upwardly Mobile While Maintaining Your Street Cred

I went to an underperforming high school with prison bars around it.  I wore secondhand clothes, loitered on corners, witnessed armed robberies at KFC, and earned the nickname “Tasty Vanilla” from my peers.  Please don’t alert the authorities, but I’ve even spray painted on a wall before.  No matter how

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04 Jul 2011

4 Common Bad Moves On First Dates

Despite yapping endlessly on this site about all the shit I don’t like on dates, there’s a bunch of things I’ve done that upon later reflection were uhhh probably not so great, ya know?  I’ve noticed most of these bad moves, that either my friends or I have made, are

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20 Jun 2011

Jumping to Dating Conclusions

It seems to me that the more of an overactive imagination you had as a child, sometimes the more that sort of thing can carry over into adulthood, and subsequently, other aspects of your life– like dating. After reading this hysterical thing about over-analyzing texts on The Hairpin, it really

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