Politics

Jesus Opens Up About his Struggles with Mental Illness After Supporting Trump
After millennia in the public eye, Son of God and Savior of Mankind Jesus Christ has begun to speak candidly about his struggles with managing addiction and Bipolar Disorder. “I’ve avoided this long enough,” the member of the Holy Trinity stated while levitating in a beam of golden light. “I

Demanding Trump’s Removal Is the Only Patriotic Choice
You can believe the current president is the best to ever hold that office. You can like his policies and truly believe he has your best interest at heart. Yet, you can still support his impeachment and removal from office. And you should. This is a pivotal moment in history, one

Netflix and Kill: Brands Talking to Each Other Is Freaky AF
Not that any month is a sane month on the internet, but October 2018 was particularly ferocious. As Brett Kavanaugh’s inflammatory Supreme Court hearings tore the country asunder, a curious undercurrent developed, wherein other people with the name Brett Kavanaugh meekly raised their hands on Twitter as if to be

Meet Scabby: Union Advocate, Revolutionary, Giant Disgusting Inflatable Rat
by Hannah Harkness Yesterday morning on my Twitter feed, a post from user @jaynooch popped up on my feed with a familiar sight for any city with organized labor: a giant inflatable cartoon rat with festering scab wounds on its stomach. Scabby the rat is outside of wework today so

Say Whatever the F*** You Want About Barron Trump
Constitutional Law expert Pamela Karlan spoke to the House Judiciary Committee’s first impeachment-related hearing yesterday. Since then, the country has been thrown into frenzied discussion over her remarks regarding the conduct of the President: Everything I know about our Constitution and its values, and my review of the evidentiary record,

How to Survive an Impeachment Thanksgiving
If the recent CNN poll holds any weight, about half the U.S. adult population wants Donald Trump impeached and removed from office, and the other half think he’s doing a super fantastic job as president. It’s pretty much split down the middle, which could present the opportunity for awkward family

Shameless SF Promoter uses Cultural Appropriation for ‘Thanksgiving Party’
A club in North Beach called ‘Carbon‘, is using a bikini-clad blonde lady in a native headdress to promote their pre-thanksgiving party. Their Eventbrite and facebook event pages say things like: “This time around the theme is Thanksgiving Pre Party!!! Free tequila Patron and Aguardiente shots before 11:00pm!” Obviously, there

Republicans Are Starting to Regard Trump as an Actual God Now
Oddsmakers have now given Donald Trump a less-than-50-percent chance of re-election less than a year from now — but for some Republicans, the president is approaching demigod status. Energy Secretary Rick Perry, who has already announced that he will depart at the end of 2019 after getting swept up in