Tucker Carlson Is From The Mission District?
I remember mindlessly scrolling on Facebook when I saw it: an SF Standard article about San Francisco’s ‘Nepo Babies.’ I thought to myself “Ahh, more rich people to hate,” and I clicked on the link. Many of the names and faces were ones I had expected to see. But one stood out: Tucker Carlson. Yes, that Tucker Carlson. The one on Fox News who continually squints when he’s talking like he’s perpetually constipated, as a way to emphasize to baby boomers in the Midwest how scary everything is, and how the only way to fix the world is to not tax corporations.
Not only is Tucker from San Francisco, he’s technically from the fucking Mission District. Yes, that Mission District. The neighborhood that has its walls covered with murals celebrating Latin America and working class resistance against the very same corporate entities Tucker has spent his entire life sucking off.
Considering who his mother was, I guess the most rebellious thing Tucker could do was to become a fascist.
Considering who his mother was, I guess the most rebellious thing Tucker could do was to become a fascist. So that’s what he did.
Well, not only a fascist, but a fascist journalist, if you want to call what he does journalism at all.
And what brought Tucker into the world of journalism? None other than his dad, who worked as a journalist and had a close working relationship with Ronald Reagan. Reagan even appointed his father, Dick Carlson, to become the Director of the United States Information Agency. This agency operated as the propaganda arm of the United States to promote capitalist talking points and to combat the Soviet Union.
Well, not without the help of his dad, who told him to become a journalist because they’d “take anybody.” Which is a nice way of saying your son is dumb and that you don’t believe in him.
Unfortunately Tucker took his dad’s advice and got into journalism. Which eventually landed him on Fox News where he basically became a conservative boomer babysitter.
Obviously where you’re from doesn’t make you who you are. So, next time someone flexes being from San Francisco, or the Mission District, just to take the wind out of their sails, be like “Isn’t that where Tucker Carlson is from?” And watch them squirm.
But in all seriousness, I was surprised. Not that he was from San Francisco, if I found out he had connections to Pacific Heights, Nob Hill or Saint Francis Woods, I wouldn’t be that surprised. But the fact that it was the Mission, out of all of SF’s many distinct neighborhoods, made me feel like I was living in some kind of weird simulation.
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6 Comments
Hey, it’s the right-winger’s and libertarian’s nature to be hypocritically contradictory. But after Fucker Tarlson pushed pro-Jan. 6 lies and gave Kanye a platform for anti-Semitism, none of his hypocrisies should be surprising anymore.
Can you tell us the address so we can make an altar to pay homage to a living god?
We can sweep all the needles to this location, after all, Tucker, Fox and the republicans are responsible for the conditions in the Mission.
All neighborhoods have dog shit in the gutter. Some of those fetid piles end up on Fox News and in the three branches of government.
Mother Tucker Carlson should’ve got an abortion to save us from her degenerate off spring. It’s not like we have a shortage of a-holes making the world worse.
Some great replies here. Nice to see that the world of empathy is alive and well. And said posts will do a lot to heal the divides in American today. So keep slinging sanctimony. It suits you well. And it must feel good to be smug when you push ‘send’.
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Hey, Woodliff, let me hijack this for a moment. After all, you love the term fascist. So, you remember throwing down a gauntlet on me when I challenged you awhile back? I replied. You didn’t. I asked you to reply. You didn’t. When? Last time was January 22, 2023. Look it up. So, why no reply? Perhaps these stories are just vapor, here today and gone tomorrow. But you actually made a request, which I honored. So, do the right thing: reply. And do it in this post, so people don’t have to scroll back through the various leanings of the memelord. We are all busy. Just be a good journalist.
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Back to this post. Carlson is odious. He isn’t a journalist. He is barely an entertainer. But everyone (most everyone?) knows that. Thing is, Guttfeld does a better job talking about politics, and is often funny too.
You are right, Woodliff. Your origin doesn’t determine your destiny. And that isn’t a reason to feel like you live in a “weird simulation.” What it is is a reason to pause when you think a place, or a space, is defined by what you think. Fascists (I used your word!!!) live in commune-filled vistas. Liberals live in capitalistic enclaves. Racists sit next to tired immigrants. My point? The world is complex. So, too, those living in it.
Slinging mud is good exercise. But you live in a marketplace. Careful you don’t eventually trip on all that you sling.